Investing In Others - Part 2

Let's continue our conversation.....

Investing in other people can be risky.

Now there's a thought that likely creates reluctance.   Let’s face it, if you put your judgment and reputation on the line and the person fails, it reflects poorly on you, right? Well…not as much as you might think. Look, I’ve hired a busload of people in my time that I regretted later on. And once I fired those people, I looked back and thought, “Jeez, why did I hire them in the first place?” 

What if I beat myself up over every bad hire, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have a single tooth in my head. 

We invest in others with good reason. We see something that we feel will pay dividends—both for them and for us. And, we go into a mutually beneficial relationship based on that feeling. So, we should stay away from investment fright, because investing pays more than it costs. Even if the person turns out to be a bust, you’ll learn a life lesson and you’ll be smarter next time around. 

But, we also have to understand that we can’t take everyone under our wing. That takes far too much time and it’s just not necessary. Not every promising person we come into contact with needs that much attention. Keeping this in mind, I believe there are three ways to invest in others:

1. Do something good.
2. Say something good.
3. Cause something good.

We’re only going to talk about the first of these today because it’s the toughest. By doing something good, I mean taking the person under your wing, making them a protégé. Investing in a person in this way can be extremely rewarding, but it can also teach some heartbreaking life lessons.

Years ago when I was first starting out in business and had only a few people on-staff that I could count on. I made a decision to invest in an old high school friend who was down on his luck.

I invested in him because I saw potential in him. He could read customers. He could talk to them articulately and intelligently. He had leadership skills. He could assess situations and see immediately what needed to be done and who should do it. On the surface he seemed like a potential powerhouse who could take over the office when I was gone.

My friend had one little problem—he was serving a jail probation sentence. Now, the fact that he was in jail didn’t mean anything to me. People make mistakes all the time. So, I went to bat for him so that he could work during his probation sentence. I knew at the time I was taking a huge risk but felt compelled to help my friend as I truly believed in my heart that he was a good person who made a bad decision.   

I’m sad to say that once his 90-day probation was over, my friend changed.  It wasn’t long before I realized that my friend was stealing both time and money from me.  I had no choice but to sever the relationship and take my lumps.

I say all that to say this: Know your investment before you take it on. You wouldn’t just open the paper and blindly select a stock to invest all of your money in. And your time and effort is worth more than any amount of money! You need someone who’s trustworthy, someone who’ll listen and learn. It’s not just on-the-job training. You’re imparting your knowledge, your work ethic, and your philosophy. Being a mentor is a huge job, but it also pays huge dividends. If you do it right, you’ll have a lifelong ally in your protégé—someone who will lend you a helping hand the next time you need it.

Even though my 'do something good' attitude didn't work out, i still believe in this principle and yes, from time to time, I learn another lesson.

Until next time, I resolve to seek progress everyday, will you join me?

Investing in Others- Part 1

Okay, I know...it's been awhile.  My travel schedule was pretty hectic and I found myself having to prioritize my own life before I could attempt to help others.  As a result, I had to take a break, but now, I am back!  

Since I am continuing this journey with you I chose to start a series that is aptly titled Investing in Others as that is what I set out to do with this blog in the first place.  I have decided from this point forward, I will break my future posts into smaller manageable bite size chunks.  I think when added together as a sum they will be of more value to us both.

Investing in Others - Part 1

Have you ever just had a day, a month, or even a whole year where you constantly said to yourself, “I wish I could catch a break. I wish someone would help me out.” We all have. For many of us, this notion sticks, breeding resentment, which can then lead to self-pity.

But if we want people to help us out, how do we prepare for it? 

That wasn't the question you thought I was going to ask, was it? I mean, you’re probably thinking, “How do I prepare for someone to help me out?” 

Well, let me express it to you through a quote I came across recently. It goes like this:

"Transformation in the world happens when people are healed and start investing in other people.” This idea comes from Michael W. Smith, a Christian rock musician. I gotta tell you, I really like this idea as it relates to you and me and our endeavor here.

You see, while we all need a helping hand from time-to-time, we’re all endowed, at some time or another, with the opportunity and ability to help someone else. And, if we don’t help others when we have the chance, what right do we have to expect help when we need it? That’s not a karmic question, ladies and gentlemen. It’s just plain common sense! And the best way we can proactively help others is by investing in them. 

Let me stop here and ask that you reread this short message and take the next few days to think about how it resonates with you.  In the coming days and weeks I will continue down this path with you in hopes that we can all make a difference in someones lives and in return make a difference in our own.

I resolve to seek progress not perfection, everyday.

See ya soon 

Faith NOT Panic

Would you agree if is said something as cliche as "life is like a box of chocolates...you never know what your gonna get? "  Or better yet, would you agree that life has a funny way of being unpredictable or sometimes unstable? 

Now, you’re probably sick of this subject and everyone that tells you to have it but you know what, if we don’t talk about it, if we don’t think about it, we’re not going to learn anything from it. And if we don’t learn, we don’t grow.

So, that being said, the lesson I want to talk to you about today goes deeper and resonates more in our personal lives.  Its something someone told me years ago that somehow bounces around in my brain until it makes a connection, usually as a result of some newfound stress I or someone else has decided to add to my life and then BAM - there it is!  

Wait for it.....

Wait for it.........

Okay, here it is.................................Faith, is the ability to not panic!

I honestly could not tell you who said this to me, but that doesn’t make it any less relevant or effective.

Of course, any time the word “faith” is brought up, most of us automatically think about our respective religious beliefs. And, in that context, the words “faith” and “panic” never really find their way into the same sentence. In the Bible, “faith” defined in Hebrews 11:1 is the ”substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” There’s no hint of panic in that definition, is there?

The faith I want to talk about today is a little more defensive, a trait we can develop to keep us from going crazy when things get tough.

Here's a question worth pondering: 

You ever notice how much you find out about a person's character in rough times?

When the money’s rolling in and the clients are climbing over each other for product, there are those who seize each and every opportunity to brag about their sales prowess or how huge their next commission check’s going to be.  When things get tough though, some of those same people tend to shrivel up and die just like the market.  They become unsure of themselves, they lose focus, they blame others or don't offer solutions...all because they panic.

Panic is not necessarily hysteria. In fact, more often than not, panic causes silence. Instead of barreling around the office, going crazy, most people tend to clam up when they panic. They shut down. They might become frazzled, but however they manifest it, they are ineffective.

Let’s face it, we’re all scared of something. And for many of us, our fear focuses on our finances. Say that five times fast, right? We want to make sure we’ll be able to provide for our families, to pay for our cars or homes, to keep the lights on and food on the table.

What happens to us when a dark period comes along?

Those fears we can usually push to the back of our brain in good times come rushing to the front and center. They take over and, for many of us, cause a paralysis of panic. And just like a dog can sense when you’re afraid, your fears can sense when you lack faith.

 
The mind is a powerful tool, but an even more powerful weapon. In good times, we tend to coast a little, don’t we? Faith in yourself and in your chosen field is pretty easy when there’s no evidence of cracks in the foundation. But when times go bad and business goes south, that easy faith dissipates quickly into the fog of fear. Our minds tend to be much more adept at conjuring up worst case scenarios than imagining how great things will be again. It’s a part of our nature that is difficult to overcome.

So, what do we do?

I could give you a thousand words here about positive thinking and everything else you would expect but sometimes the most powerful way to say something is also the easiest: 

Just Believe.


Every day I resolve to seek Progress, not Perfection and progress starts with my ability to believe.  Do you?

Mental Toughness - Part 3

Wow...talk about mental toughness and turning focus on and off!  I have had the fortunate opportunity to travel extensively over the last few months and had to turn my focus towards serving those who contracted me verses taking the time to complete my thoughts for you.  As I spoke of in Part 2, sometimes its a necessary function in life.  

Good news is that I am back in the saddle and ready to finish this ride with you.

Getting back to our discussion about Mental Toughness I want to cover the last aspect that Dr. Yukelson writes about; composure. In this case, composure is about staying cool and handling the pressure of doing business. Sure, in an ideal world, we’d all make the smart decisions all of the time to avoid problems. 

But you know what? We don’t. None of us are 100% on 100% of the time. It sucks, but it’s the truth. So, we have to know that we’re going to have to handle pressure from time to time and be able to thrive on it.

Composure is not just about embracing pressure and staying cool. It’s also about regaining your psychological footing after a distraction or setback. Lets be honest.  We’re all going to experience bumps in the road, but how we drive after we hit them shows what kind of character we have. Do we become timid and lose confidence in our driving ability? Or, do we blaze ahead too fast, hitting more bumps and trash the car? Neither of these is the reaction of choice. Ideally, if we have good composure, we forge ahead along the road, mindful of other bumps that might be ahead, but never doubting that we will get wherever we’re going. 

I would encourage you at this point to go back and read all three parts of this series to refresh or recharge your mind.  Our goal here is to fortify our minds and accomplish the goals we have set for ourselves. 

I want to encourage you to believe in your abilities, keep your motivation high and your focus nimble, but true, and have your composure to protect it all.

I resolve to seek progress everyday, will you join me?  Good luck, my mentally tough friend.        

  

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Mental Toughness - Part 2

Today, we are going to look at the first  three characteristics on the list in your quest towards being Mentally Tough.

First off, there’s self-belief. Now, this may seem like a no-brainer, but let’s give it some time in the sun. Self-belief is not simply a matter of saying, “Yeah, I’m good at what I do.” And, it’s definitely not the same as being arrogant. It’s a stronger foundation that doesn’t crack or crumble in the face of adversity.

After you set a goal, you start toward it with an unshakeable knowledge that you can accomplish it, because you know your opponents and you know how and why you’re better than they are. You’re part of a team that is head and shoulders above its competitors…and that knowledge should give you strength and self-belief.

The second aspect of mental toughness—motivation—is a strong source of forward movement, the burning desire to accomplish whatever goal you’ve set for yourself. And it certainly is good for that. But being highly motivated can also help you bounce back more effectively when you hit a stumbling block. Instead of having your eyes blinded by defeat, a strong motivation will help you to see your goal even more clearly than before your setback.

The third aspect of mental toughness—focus—is also more than you might think at first glance. Sure, staying focused means weathering distractions of various kinds. You shouldn’t look over your shoulder when you’re running the race. All that does it take your eyes off the goal and give the guy behind you time to catch up. Case in point, last night, I was reading a story to my 6 yr old son and Charlie Brown, a well known character was competing in the school Olympics and much to his surprise was poised to win it all...until he glanced over his shoulder, closed his eyes and trudged ahead only to find out he missed the final turn in the race.  I probably don't need to tell you his loss of focus cost him the win.

On the other side of the coin, you shouldn’t let any negative thoughts sway you. Being focused is not only about what’s going on around you, it’s also about what’s going through your mind. What kinds of thoughts are you pondering as you race toward your goal? They better be positive and beneficial, otherwise they don’t belong in your head.

But being focused also requires the discipline to know when to turn your focus on and when to turn it off. You might be asking, “When would I want to turn off my focus?” Well, there is something known as compassion that everyone you should give in to when you feel the urge as  it causes you to temporarily switch your focus off to help someone else.  The cool thing about displaying compassion is that its a circular act…it’ll always come back to you when you need it most. So never hesitate to switch off your focus temporarily if someone else needs you. You may lose a little time pushing toward your goal right now, but you’ll be saved a lot of heartache later when you need help.

That's it for today, look for part 3 in the coming week.  In the meantime, I resolve to seek progress, everyday - will you join me?

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Mental Toughness - Part 1

As we embark on our journey through the ever changing market, I thought it fitting to encourage you to consider making yourself more mentally tough.

Now, some people confuse having “thick skin” with mental toughness. They feel that being a mentally tough person means being able to take criticism and barrel forward. Maybe they learn from it, maybe they don’t, but, either way, they’re mentally tough, right? Wrong.

Just a basic definition of mental toughness shows that it has less to do with a thick skin than having a strong core. I recently read a short outline about Mental Toughness in athletes by Dr. David Yukelson from a large State University. In it, he cites four key psychological characteristics of mentally tough athletes:

1. Self-belief
2. Motivation
3. Focus; and
4. Composure.

That’s a heck of a lot more than just having thick skin, isn’t it?   

Before I dive into these aspects,  I would really like for you you to write these down and take a few moments each day to self reflect on where you stack up in those areas.   Next week, I will post Part 2 where I will spend time diving into a few of these aspects to help you on your journey.

Until then, I resolve to seek progress through being mentally tough, will you join me? 

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Passion Part 2 - Why do we need Passion?

WHY DO WE NEED PASSION?

I know this seems like an obvious point, so I’ll get straight to it: this is a business that you MUST be passionate about to thrive; otherwise you will be in constant anguish.  I’m not going to enumerate all the things that are difficult about the mortgage game – that would be totally counterproductive! – but just think about how many times you’ve been talking about work with a friend outside of the business and he says “Man, I just don’t know how you do it.”

The answer, of course, is that you love it.  Maybe you don’t know exactly what you love about it yet, but you know that without that passion, the day to day of the business would be overwhelming.  So other than intrinsic survival, what are the other benefits of being passionate?

Well, for one, being passionate induces self-confidence.  As I said earlier, when you are passionate about something, you begin to see how everything in your life fits together to better suit that passion.  This includes career passion – when you love what you are doing, you will have greater confidence in actions and decisions you take to further your career.  Who couldn’t benefit from a little career confidence?

This increased confidence influences another benefit of passion – reduced stress.  When you aren’t second-guessing yourself at every juncture, your stress levels plummet.  Further, we often don’t realize how much stress we put on ourselves by quelling our passions when in reality being passionate can be a natural state.  Resisting that natural state because we are afraid of appearing overzealous can be taxing on the spirit.  So living in that natural state of passion – even if it’s for something as seemingly mundane as the mortgage business – is a welcome relief.

Another benefit of living passionately is that it enhances relationships, which is one of the cornerstones of our business.  You see, people understand passion, and they respect it.  And your clients will respect sincere displays of that passion for your career.  They will find it much easier to trust and rely on an someone who truly enjoys what he does, rather than some pushy snake who could just as easily be selling vacuums, used cars, or igloos, - or, even worse, an apathetic paper pusher who really couldn’t care one way or another about helping their clients reach their goals.   

Again, people understand passion, and they are drawn to people who possess it.
 

That's it for today, look for part 3 sometime next week.  Until then, I resolve to seek progress, not perfection using Passion as my fuel...will you join me?

As always, comments are appreciated and do me a favor - don't keep me a secret!  Encourage others to follow my blog in their attempt to seek Progress.

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